Some recent events in my life have made me reflect on the topic of confidence: why is it that some people seem to always be confident and, why even if are we confident most of our life sometimes we just loose it? Why is confidence such a transitory thing?
As adults, we rarely speak about confidence. This is more a topic discussed around adolescence, that is when we first feel confident or, on the contrary, not confident. As grown-ups there is a certain level of expectation to be confident or at least to feel confident about some aspects of our lives. However, if you take a closer look, in reality there are many adults who do not feel any more self-confident than when they were teenagers.
Most of them believe that confidence comes once they have been able to achieve or acquire certain things. While part of that is true, as our confidence does grow when we conquer new spaces outside of the comfort zone, we cannot wait for that day when we have achieved everything on our bucket list so that we feel confident.
However, we notice that despite being able to achieve some of our goals in life and overcome fears, confidence can still be shaken when we face challenging situations and when we feel derailed on the path of fulfilling our dreams.
So how can we live confidence in a conscious way?
Having reviewed my experience with confidence throughout my life and my learnings, here are 10 things I concluded about confidence:
Feeling confident is only a state of mind and you can access it at any time.
Confidence is directly linked to our physiology, to how we feel in our body. We can immediately adopt a confident posture if we decide to imagine we are the most confident person on earth. Practice power poses and you will feel it for yourself.
Doing sports, moving or dancing, considerably increases our level of confidence.
Trying new things, conquering the unknown, daring and acting despite our fear gives us tremendous confidence.
Spending time on our own, getting to know ourselves, listening to our heart and connecting with our essence gives us authentic confidence; when we are able to surrender to that sweet infinite space inside our heart, we will know who we really are and nobody will be able to take confidence away from us because we will know we are life itself and that we are loved. Connect with your body and disconnect from the mind’s narrative.
Practicing gratitude makes us feel confident. By keeping a gratitude journal we develop a lens that helps us see how blessed we already are.
Another statement of confidence is staying loyal to ourselves: saying ‘No’ to people, invitations and situations that are toxic to us, that don't bring us value or are not in line with our values; listening to our heart’s desire and to our body, giving our body the needed sleep and healthy food and our soul what nurtures it.
The most confident person in the room has the most relaxed breath: if we get into our breathing, we get into our unconscious. Breathe into your diaphragm; that is the key to your confidence: breathing low and slow, taking time.
Becoming competent: practice what you are good at until you become the best.
Being at peace with who we are and not apologizing for who we are. Be content with yourself, love yourself unconditionally and your confidence will shine through.
Now I would like to hear from you: what makes you feel confident?
Furthermore, if you would like to take your confidence to the next level, book your FREE online Coaching session with me now.